Airbrushed.

I was having a conversation with a male friend on the bus yesterday, and casually pointed out how chipped/worn out my bare nails were. I called it "gross" because it was in its bare glory, skin slightly tearing after abusing it while out in the wilderness (whats new). I felt embarrassed in the presence of this fellow photographer who has supposedly "seen it all" because most girls in this industry are primped from head to toe. 

Including myself. Thats if I actually make time to visit my beauty sponsors religiously like the other girls do lol. 

The thing that bothered me is that I caught myself feeling legitimately embarrassed for not living up to this standard of having pretty nails. Some self-inflicted standard that everyone has been subconsciously benchmarked upon. I was thinking out loud, about how I need to fix those problematic nails when my friend pointed out something so arresting. It made me pause and take rein of my thoughts. 

"Since when was it not okay to have bare nails?" Since when? 

Since we let the media dictate and set the standards of acceptance. Thats freaking when. Being a photographer and DI Artist, I'm incredibly guilty of standing at the other side of the spectrum. And honestly, I didn't feel good when tasked to airbrush celebrities and models before their images blow up in the press.

I'm not saying we shouldn't attempt to beautify ourselves you know. I love looking at pretty nails. I love makeup. I love doing my hair. But I do it for myself, not for the world. I do it because it makes me happy. I do it because my split ends are bothering me, because I need to go to a shoot and my nails would look better trimmed. Not really sure where this post is going, but the crux of my little speech today would be to urge you to take a baby step back to think about a prevalent yet highly undermined issue like this. To re-evaluate our thoughts and how it affects us and the people around us.

I resonate deeply with what Shu-Ann said, "We were not born to evaluate our looks.  What stops me (from doing plastic surgery), isn't because I think its wrong you know. I think you should do what makes you happy. I stop because, I don't know if thats the root of the problem. I know that if I fix one thing, there will be something else that I will be unhappy with. Because the way that we think about ourselves, is something that we've learnt. That we have been conditioned to do. Like we are conditioned to pick apart the way that we look, and its never-ending."

This got me. You preach it gurrrrrl.