Beginning to love my dorky-out-of-place hair. When I first chopped my long locks off, I thought that it would be fun to look like a boy (as a woman in my early twenties). When everyone around me is trying to be all womanly and sophisticated, here I am stuck in this awkward transition. Many have told me that I look far younger than I actually am, which is both aggravating and comforting all at the same time. I mean, which woman would want to look older than she actually is.. right? However, I quickly realized that when you are in the workforce, people only take your seriously if you look.. well, serious. My petite frame makes me look like a 18 year old, and the height disadvantage does not help either. The thing is, I do like being engaged in serious conversations, and people only realize that the dynamics of my mind functions beyond my years - only after crossing that "oh she is so young" barrier.
One thing that amuses me is the amount of importance that girls place in growing up as fast as they can. Like them, I could not wait to be a woman. Often dreaming that I would be earning a considerable amount of moolah by engaging myself in the things I truly love. I could not wait to make decisions for myself, and attain all the freedom in the world. But maturity has its hefty price. It often opens your mind to the world, and distinguishes every bit of innocence in you. The more you read and study anthropology, you realize that human beings are the worse monsters. You will start to question humanity. Very harsh, but extremely true. When I first started my blog 6years ago, it was simply a platform for me to write about my struggles as a 17 year old. I was that awkward kid who had songs from ABBA and The Carpenters on auto-play. I wrote a considerable amount of entries about life, death (was mourning the death of my mother back then) and the occasional, love. It amuses me when I get a random comment about how I should stop writing because I suck. The next moment I get another comment from a stranger who could fully relate to my words. Now that university is coming to an end in a couple of months, I have been having mixed feelings and thinking about shutting down this blog or letting it slowly become stagnant. Afterall, blogging is (or, was) really just a sideline job as a student.
PS: I know this is entirely irrelevant, but do take care during this period of time. We will get through it together!
PS: I know this is entirely irrelevant, but do take care during this period of time. We will get through it together!